Alucard's Insane RP Adventure!

[Accept the Psypher Sword]
[Go to the Castle]
Raphael: Let's finish things.

Alan pulls out a new clip and replaces his current one, pulling back the feeder after loading it.

Alan "Should we contact Beat? I put a bug on him so he should hear us."

[Call Beat]
[Don't contact Beat]

[Don't contact Beat]
Raphael: I fear he joined the enemy... Archfiends...

{For Raphael}

Alan "Eh. They aren't so bad. They willingly united with us Heroes when we had the war with Zoda 'Zoda's Revenge'. They even saved my life a few times. And if HE joined them, I doubt they're really going to make him do truly bad things. According to this bug, he just killed a lake monster and these people he saved are confused as to why he's being a nice guy. But if you insist, just remember we can contact him any time."

Together they cross the bridge to the Castle, and they reach the front gate.

Alan "What is it with this place and large gates? Must be one helluva reoccurring theme."

As they walk up to the gate, 2 statues suddenly turn into humans with spears and block them. They speak in perfect unison.

Guards "Halt! You shall not enter the Demon Lord's Castle without permission or unless you are of royalty, which you are not. Step away this instant!"

[Step back]
[Try to talk them out of it]
[Start a fight]
[Try to bribe them]
[LP Ability: Use Alan (By throwing him) to beat them both down]
[Try to sing a song to get them to move]
[Have Alan do something to let them in]
[Jump off the bridge and die a stupid death after coming oh so far]
[Call for Beat]
[Call for The Black Rose]
[Stand around and take in the scenery while being an insolent and lawbreaking jackass]

Raphael: Look, I'm openminded enough to coexist with vampires, werewolves, witches, and all those but archfiends, aka demons push the comfort zone, hell the leader is named "Villain!"
Guards: IDENTIFY YOURSELF!
Raphael: Hmm... it worked before
[Try to sing a song to get them to move]
Raphael:It's not unusual to be loved by anyone
It's not unusual to have fun with anyone
but when I see you hanging about with anyone
It's not unusual to see me cry,
oh I wanna' die
It's not unusual to go out at any time
but when I see you out and about it's such a crime
if you should ever want to be loved by anyone,
It's not unusual it happens every day no matter what you say
you find it happens all the time
love will never do what you want it to
why can't this crazy love be mine
It's not unusual, to be mad with anyone
It's not unusual, to be sad with anyone
but if I ever find that you've changed at anytime
it's not unusual to find out that I'm in love with you
whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh

{For Raphael}

The guards simply stand there staring at Raphael.

Guards "We do not compute, now stand aside, mortals!"

[Step back]
[Try to talk them out of it]
[Start a fight]
[Try to bribe them]
[LP Ability: Use Alan (By throwing him) to beat them both down]
[Have Alan do something to let them in]
[Jump off the bridge and die a stupid death after coming oh so far]
[Call for Beat]
[Call for The Black Rose]
[Stand around and take in the scenery while being an insolent and lawbreaking jackass]

[Try to talk them out of it]
Raphael: We come to bring a verbal message to your master sent from his significant other and it is very urgent!

[Command the Fire Hawk to bomb the people]

Beat: Dance people. Dance. ÒwÓ

[Go to the Archfiend's Fortress]

{For Beat}

Jumping into the Fire Hawk, Beat commands it to rain down on the people. The Fire Hawk blasts and burninates the countryside they're on. After that, the Fire Hawk flies back to the Archfiend's Fortress, right at the front door.

[Enter through the front door by walking]
[Crash the Fire Hawk through the front door]
[Fire on the Fortress]
[Do a swan dive into the moat]
[Jump in through the big window in front]








---------------------------------------------------------
{For Raphael}

The guards remain stationary.

Guards "We know everything coming to the Demon Lord, and we know you are lying. Step away right this instant!"

Alan "Geeze, you haven't played many adventure games, did you? What's the plan now, tough guy?"

Alan walks up to the guards. They point their spears at him

"Hey, hey, calm down you fine gents. I'm not like him, I want to talk to you like a regular person, not a lying person trying to intrude on your most likely important business. So...either of you want gum?

Pulling out a pack of gum, Alan offers it to them. They both drop their spears and reach for the gum.

[Attack]
[Let them get the gum]
[Steal their spears]
[Use Alan as a weapon to destroy them]
[Use this as a chance to sneak in]
[Run back and jump off the bridge]
[Steal Alan's Tommy Gun]

Raphael: You ass!
[Use Alan as a weapon to destroy them]

{For Raphael}

Picking up Alan (Damn, he's really light. How much does this guy weigh?!), Raphael throws him at the guards. Alan smiles broadly as he shifts his body to fly into both of the guards and knock them down. The guards turn to stone and shatter to pieces.

"Good shot, mate. I haven't been used as a weapon in a while, and you're damn good!"

[Go inside]
[Stay out here]
[Take their spears]
[Stand around and inevitably get noticed by passerby's]
[Fight Alan]

[Crash the Fire Hawk through the front door]

Beat, with a rather long delay, suddenly started to yell...

Beat: MAYDAY! MAYDAY! CRASHLANDING! OMFG D:

...and then realised it was already too late.

Beat: Oh...

{For Beat}

Jumping out of the crashed (But not wrecked) Fire Hawk, he is suddenly pinned by MM

MM "Did you miss me? I just want to have some fun with you, that's all. Just wanna make you smile <3"

MM starts to drag Beat to the torture chamber, but is quickly caught in a net thrown by Villain.

Villain "Hello, cadet. Glad to see you're well. According to the news, you blew some people up. Good job! It's the first step to being a supervillain: showing no mercy. Now then, what do you wish to do? And don't worry, the place has a great insurance plan."

[Rest]
[Tickle torture MM]
[Start a fight with the 2]
[Ask for some alcohol]
[Go somewhere else]
[Stand around and relax since this is your new home]

(Beat: I think I'm in love... @w@)

[Ask for some alcohol]

Beat: Hmm I dunno not sure... oh yeah! Got any alcohol? Just wondering. It tends to light up guite nicely if it's strong enough. And of course, it's just nice to drink. And I guess I could go somewhere else.. hmm... got any missions?

[Take their spears]
[Go inside]
Raphael: Onward!

{For Beat}

Villain "You're underage, but hey, we ain't exactly law abiding citizens for the most part, are we? Here ya go!"

Villain hands Beat 2 bottles of alcohol. Surprisingly, they stay cold no matter what, even in the desert!

"Enjoy. And no, I don't have any missions, cadet...hey wait a minute, where is your violent friend and Alan? Are they together?"

[Yes, and go check on them]
[No,I don't even remember those two]
[Yes, but I think they're fine]
[Drink the alcohol and don't answer the question]
[Start juggling]
[Ask about MM's garden (How the hell did this get brought up?)]
[Start a fight with Villain and/or MM]









---------------------------------------------
{For Raphael}

Alan "Alright, Comrade! Forward!"

They run into the castle, kicking the front doors open.
"Oh wait. Hang on."

Alan briefly runs back outside to get his gum and then returns
"Not losing 2 perfectly good sticks of gum."

Inside, the see the building. It looks like a large cathedral with stained glass windows showing a menacing figure wearing a purple cape, armor, spiked shoulder pads, and on his head a helmet with two horns on top that shadow his face, bright yellow eyes in the dark shadow covering his true face.

Alan "No...this can't be. The Demon Lord isn't...no..."

In a dark, ominous voice, someone speaks.
???? "It is, Creator!"

Above them in the center of the cathedral, they see a floating platform descend. There is a figure on the platform. Eventually it turns out that figure is the being in the stained glass window.

Alan "...Zoda...You're the Demon Lord?"

Alan walks a few paces forward before stopping and moonwalking back to where he previously was.

"HAHAHAHA! That slaps me on the knee!"
Zoda "Yes I am, Creator! I remember our last meeting. You were lucky to defeat me and stopping the destruction of San Fransisco!"
Alan "I don't believe in luck, and you know a damn lot about that."
Zoda "Well what have you and your accomplice come here for? My ultimate demise? Surrendering at last?"
Alan "Quick to the assumptions, aren't ya, Alien Prime Invader?"

[Tell him you came for bread]
[Tell him yes, you came to slay him]
[Try to convince him you aren't here to fight]
[Try to negotiate with him]
[Throw the spears at him]
[Tell him you came to give Alan to him and jump Alan (What?! You'd stab me in the back?! *Sigh* Oh well not the first time)
[Ask a question that will start a JRPG length conversation on who Zoda is and why he keeps calling Alan "Creator" (It's a long story. Almost as long as this choice!)]
[Run away as fast as a little bunny]
[Do nothing]

Raphael: So this is the head honcho I've been tracking all this time... I wonder if Death will be interested in this conflict...
[Ask a question that will start a JRPG length conversation on who Zoda is and why he keeps calling Alan "Creator" (It's a long story. Almost as long as this choice!)]

Beat: Um I dunno. Thanks for the booe. But yeah I got no idea, I can go check on them if you want though. And also, hmm, Miss Murder, you got a garden, right?

[Yes, and go check on them]
[Ask about MM's garden (How the hell did this get brought up?)]

{For Beat}

Villain "Yes, MM has a garden. It's got...interesting plants. The thing is is that all of them feed on human blood, and that's where she gets rid of a lot of people. You can visit it sometime, just stay away from the plants."

Villain walks to the reception desk buried under the rubble and pulls out a can of gasoline.

"Here, I'll fill up the Road Slayer before you leave."

He pours the entire canister into the Road Slayer, giving it 5 Fire Strikes.

"You should go. Check up on them, maybe they're doing something interesting. Luckily, long ago I put an electric bug in Alan's body, so the Fire Hawk can instantly seek them out."

Getting into the Fire Hawk, it auto-assigns it's destination and takes off. Within seconds Beat is flying over a dark town with a large castle under a red sky. The indicator says that Alan is in the Castle, the front entrance at that.

[Land and go in through the front]
[Crash the Fire Hawk through the front]
[Open fire on the castle]
[Jump out and crash in through a window]
[Check out the town below]
[Do nothing]
[Commit suicide in an over-the-top fashion]












------------------------------------------
{For Raphael}

Alan pulls a plastic bag out of his pocket and hands it to Raphael

"Here we go. This might be long, so here's a snack. The Pookas at the restaurant gave it to me since they wanted to at least give you something to try. Save it for later if you don't want it now."

Opening it, it's a large piece of toast with an egg on it. It looks very good.

[Raphael got Egg on Toast! Recovers 50 HP and 20 LP. It's so large it's 2 servings!]

"Alright...
Now this is a story all about how
my life got flipped turned upside down.
I'd like to take a minute just sit down, then,
I'll tell you all about how I met Zoda back then.

In a helicopter on my way
I went to C island to visit a day,
chilling out, arriving, and looking 'round the place
to see my friend Alucard who's a helluvan ace
when I was told that he was missing,
went into a cave with snakes all hissing.
I got in one little fight and I got involved,
there was a whole huge mystery that had to be solved.

I wound up in a space ship and things were more clear
like the mystery had brought an invader down here,
if anything I could say that this was too strange
but I thought "Nah forget it, he's in attack range!"

I fought hard and valiantly for a minute or two
and I yelled to the fiend "Yo chump, kill ya later!"
looked at my success I was finally done,
I'd saved Alucard and I had won."

Zoda simply stares at him, and if he wasn't a huge villain, we're pretty sure he would've face palmed.

Zoda "Basically, he got involved when trying to save Alucard, he defeated me, then we raged a whole war that determined the fate of your pathetic human race. He defeated me again, but after that, I returned again and now we're fighting a new war. My revenge."

Alan "Yeah, that about sums it up. I just wanted to try something different than the usual explanation process, ya know?"

[Start the fight]
[Tell him you want bread]
[Offer him an item]
[Throw the spears at him]
[Throw Alan at him]
[LP Ability to start the fight with an advantage]
[Try to negotiate]
[Run away]
[Do nothing]
[Fight Alan]
[Kill self]

[Crash the Fire Hawk through the front]

Beat came out of the Fire Hawk, tilting his head with a loud CRACK.

He then noticed Alan and Raph, pointed his finger at em and shouted:

Beat: HEY, YO! NINJA TURTLE AND CREATOR PERSON! How's you?!

{For Beat}

Alan "Kamerad! Glad you're here! The Demon Lord is right there!"

Alan points at a menacing figure wearing a purple cape, armor, spiked shoulder pads, and on his head a helmet with two horns on top that shadow his face, bright yellow eyes glow in the dark shadow covering his true face.

"We're close! Did you come to help?"

[Yes I'm here to help]
[Yes I need the bread]
[No I came to capture you for the Archfiends!]
[No I'm just here for the food]
[I'm here to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I (sadly) have no gum!]
[Kill self]
[Immediately command the Fire Hawk to shoot at the Demon Lord]
[Command the Fire Hawk to shoot at Alan and Raphael]
[Command the Fire Hawk to shoot at Alan]
[Command the Fire Hawk to shoot at Raphael]
[Stand around and fail at accomplishing anything of real importance]





---------------------------------------------------------
{For Raphael}

Alan and Raphael turn around as they see a large ship crash through the wall behind them, barely stopping in front of them. Beat jumps out of the ship holding a new sword and wearing keen light armor.

Alan "Kamerad! Glad you're here! The Demon Lord is right there!"

Alan points at Zoda.

[Talk to Beat]
[Ignore Beat]
[Attack Beat]
[Insult Beat]
[Start a fight with Zoda]
[Talk to Alan]
[Do nothing]

Raphael: Beat... *turns to Zoda* I suppose we have to fight you now.
[Start a fight with Zoda]

[Yes I'm here to help]

Beat: Yeah am here to help, Villain got me some pretty sweet stuff ^^ So, evil person slash persons, ready for a beat down~?!

{For everyone}

Zoda "Hah! You shall never defeat me, Prime Invader Zoda! Have at..."

{LP Ability}

Alan "Enough talking, Fiend! HUZZAH!"

Alan pulls out a butterfly knife and, after a few fancy moves, pulls out his Tommy Gun and fires a giant red blast.

"I'm not gonna fight you with this knife, I'm gonna shoot you with this!"

Alan puts the knife back in his pocket after closing it. The blast does 60 Damage!

"That's a trick, kids! Interrupt the supervillain during his monologue when they're talking and not ready!"

{BATTLE!}
Name: Zoda

HP: 400
Strength: 30-70
LP: 100

An evil alien invader and Alan's true Arch Nemesis (even more so than Ranamon!), Zoda's last 2 attempts to take over the world were foiled by Alan and the Heroes and Villain's united forces. He gave up on taking over the world and now focuses on destroying it. It looks like this is his new stronghold.

[Fight]
[Item]
[LP Ability]
[Defend]
[Taunt] (You can still do another option if you choose to taunt)
[Run away like a chump after getting this far]

Party:
{Alan: HP 110/110 LP 60/70}
{Beat: HP 85/85 LP 80/80}
{Raphael: HP 90/90 LP 70/70}

[Fight]
[Item]
[LP Ability]

Beat: Dun dun duun... dun dun duun... all good will be.... I hope...

Beat took Road slayer from his waist and a bottle of booze from his bag, covering the Road Slayers blade with it. After that, he even sprayed some of his Highly Flammable Spray+ on it.

Item: Fire Bomb!

Beat threw a fire bomb at Zoda, wich exploded the very moment the two, the bomb and Zoda, collided. Beat then took Road Slayer and ran at Zoda, using the already thrown fire bomb and it's smoke as a distraction, and stabbed him deep with the flammable sword.

Beat: Heeerrrre goes nothing!

Beat pulled the trigger on Road Slayer, flamming it.